A Sketch by Jean-Pierre Martinez
Two characters (male or female) arrive. The second one is laughing and remain so throughout the scene.
Max – You seem to be in a good mood. What’s got you so happy?
Pat – Didn’t I tell you?
Max – No. Are you going on vacation?
Pat – I’m leaving the company. For good.
Max – You got fired?
Pat – Better than that!
Max – You won the lottery?
Pat – I have a very rare genetic condition. The doctors were struggling for months but finally diagnosed it. There was a one in twenty million chance it would happen to me. Can you believe it? I’m going on extended sick leave tonight.
Max – Ah, I understand your hilarity. It’s much better than winning the lottery, indeed.
Pat – But it’s not a fatal disease, okay? It’s just a condition that… makes me extremely euphoric all day.
Max – Ah, I see…
Pat – I can’t stop laughing from morning till night.
Max – Obviously, in our line of work, that could be problematic.
Pat – Can you imagine me telling a client: so, here you have this model in solid oak. It’s a bit more expensive, of course, but it’s the best we currently offer in terms of coffins… And then bursting out laughing right after saying that!
Max – It’s true that in the funeral business, constant laughter could be considered a professional hazard… And you really can’t hold it back?
Pat – I’m telling you, it’s genetic. It’s a very rare orphan disease. There’s no treatment.
Max – And your family, how are they handling it?
Pat – Very badly. We hadn’t spoken in twenty years, and suddenly I’m laughing all day. My friends, the same. Everyone’s convinced I’m mocking them.
Max – And right now, are you sure you’re not making fun of me?
Pat – No, I swear I’m not.
The other puts away his e-cigarette.
Max – Well, enough joking around. I have to get back to work. And believe me, it’s not making me laugh. So, have fun, okay?
Pat – But wait…
Pat laughs. The other one leaves, looking upset.
Black.
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A sketch from the collection Nicotine
Link to the collection for free download (PDF)
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