One character is there. A second one arrives.
One – You don’t seem okay. What’s going on?
Two – I got flashed again.
One – By a speed camera?
Two – Yeah, a speed camera! Not the paparazzi…
One – Ah, damn… Were you going too fast…?
Two – No, I was going too slow.
One – Seriously?
Two – Yeah, caught doing twelve kilometres per hour.
One – That’s insane…
Two – On the highway. I had just come out of the petrol station.
One – Twelve kilometres per hour…
Two – I don’t drive a sports car, you know. Takes a while to get up to speed. Five hundred euros.
One – No way…? Is it true?
Two – Of course it’s not true, idiot!
One – You didn’t get flashed?
Two – I did!
One – But… why?
Two – Because I was going too fast, you moron! I got flashed, I’m telling you!
One – No need to get upset. It wasn’t very clear, either…
Two – It seems like you’re the one who’s not very clear… Are you okay?
One – I just got out of the hospital.
Two – No way? So that’s why you’re still a bit groggy. What happened?
One – Allergic reaction to a bee sting. Right on my throat.
Two – Seriously?
One – Yes. Bees are real bastards, I swear.
Two – They make honey. And they enable pollination. If bees disappear… with all the chemicals…
One – Chemicals?
Two – The ones they spray on crops! Bees pollinate the flowers, and that’s what poisons them.
One – You know a lot about bees.
Two – I have a friend who’s a beekeeper.
One – Anyway, I didn’t think a simple bee sting could land you in the emergency room.
Two – Maybe that’s why.
One – Of course that’s why! I got stung, I’m telling you!
Two – No, I mean, maybe it’s because of those chemicals. Bees collect them, and then when they sting you, they inject all that crap back into you.
One – Are you suggesting if I had been stung by a bee from organic crops, I wouldn’t have ended up in the hospital?
Two – Who knows… But now, are you okay?
One – I’m fine. And you?
Two – Apart from getting flashed…
Fade to black.

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A sketch from the collection Enough is enough!
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L’article Too Slow est apparu en premier sur La Sketchothèque.