A Sketch by Jean-Pierre Martinez
A man arrives, hesitates for a moment, and sits down on the floor in front of the mailboxes. He starts to doze off. Another tenant arrives and spots him.
Tenant – Come on, wake up, my friend. I understand you might be tired, but you can’t stay here, right?
The man wakes up.
Man – And why not?
Tenant – Well… because this is a building lobby, not a shelter. Don’t you know where to go?
Man – No… Right now, I’m homeless.
Tenant – Well, all the more reason, my friend! If you’re homeless, why on earth would you want to settle here?
Man – You’re right…
The man gets up.
Tenant – Thanks for your understanding. But you know what? Deep down, I envy you.
Man – Really?
Tenant – Sometimes, I too would like to be homeless. Not having to go home every night. Not having the same person waiting for me at home.
Man – In that case, could you perhaps let me stay at your place for a night? It would give you a bit of distraction…
Tenant – At my place?
Man – It’s so cold outside.
Tenant – Yes, I know; I had to wear my thermal shirt this morning… And despite that, I froze in the office all day.
Man – If I spend the night outside, I’m not sure I’ll wake up tomorrow morning.
Tenant – Are you sure you’re not being a bit dramatic?
Man – Do you really want to have my death on your conscience?
The tenant hesitates, then takes out a banknote from her pocket.
Tenant – Well, it’s your lucky day. Take this and go sleep at a hotel.
Man – Ten euros? How do you expect me to find a hotel room at that price?
Tenant – Okay, here’s thirty, and you get out of here, okay? I’m sure you can find a budget hotel or something. You wouldn’t want to sleep in a palace either, would you?
Man – It’ll do. Thanks, Your Grace.
Tenant – And if you can’t find a hotel that will take you in, at least you can buy some cheap wine to keep warm.
Man – You’re saving my life. God will repay you…
A woman arrives.
Woman – What are you doing here?
Man – I didn’t have the entry code, and I lost your mobile number. Since I knew you’d be arriving soon… But this lady kindly offered me to wait at her place.
Woman – Thank you, that’s very kind of you.
The woman is taken aback but doesn’t show it.
Tenant – Not at all. Among neighbours, it’s only natural.
Woman – It’s true, with this cold… Let me introduce you to my brother. He’s staying with me for a few days before heading back to Bucharest for a film shoot. He’s an actor…
Tenant – Nice to meet you, then.
Man – Performers have always had a bad reputation. In the Middle Ages, they were considered thieves, and they were even refused burial in cemeteries with good Christians.
Woman – Fortunately, we’re not in the Middle Ages anymore… I shouldn’t say this in front of him, but he’s an excellent actor. You’ll see; he’ll have a great career…
Tenant – I don’t doubt it…
Man – Don’t bother this lady with that; she’s probably eager to get home to her husband.
Tenant – Well then, I’ll leave you.
Man – Thanks again.
Tenant – Not at all.
Man – Really nice, isn’t she?
Woman – Yes, there’s a good atmosphere in this building, it seems.
They exit.
Black.
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A sketch from the collection Open Letters
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