A Sketch by Jean-Pierre Martinez
A man in striped pyjamas is lying in bed, and he slowly awakens. As he sits up, he looks around, appearing uncertain about his surroundings. Then, the same woman enters, looking twenty years younger. She’s dressed more youthfully, with red lipstick, and displays a confident demeanour. She’s carrying a simple breakfast on a tray.
Woman – Good morning!
The man clearly struggles to wake up.
Man – Good morning…
Woman – How are you feeling?
Man – I’m fine… I think.
Woman – Here’s your breakfast.
Man – Breakfast in bed? Thanks, but… what’s the special occasion?
She doesn’t provide an immediate response but offers an indulgent smile as she takes a seat by his bedside.
Woman – I’m not sure how good the coffee is. It’s definitely not an espresso.
Man – That’s fine, I’ll still drink it… I feel like I have a hangover.
He starts to drink his coffee and eat a piece of rusk.
Woman – Sorry, I think these are unsalted rusks…
He smiles and continues chewing his rusk.
Man – You know what I was thinking?
Woman – No…
Man – I don’t think we can really change things.
Woman – Things? You mean…
Man – Or people.
Woman – Ah, I see…
Man – For instance, with my family… I knew right away it wouldn’t work.
Woman – Your family? I’m your wife, remember…
Man – No, I’m not talking about that, of course. You, that’s different… (Pause) Are you sure we’re married?
Woman – Why are you asking me that?
Man – I don’t know… I’m sleeping in a single bed…
Woman – Oh, yeah…
Man – I can’t even remember that I’m married, can you believe it? The doctor said it’s normal. I haven’t regained immediate memory.
Woman – We’ve been married for twenty years…
Man (lost in thought) – Yes, it’s strange, isn’t it? Not regaining immediate memory. That’s the last thing I heard, and it’s the only thing I remember… (Pause) I don’t know… Maybe it stems from that…
Woman – What?
Man – The need I’ve always had to mess everything up… So I wouldn’t risk getting disappointed… (He picks up the apple and looks at it.) When the worm is in the apple, it can’t end well for anyone.
Woman – Except for the worm… (He looks at her in surprise, and she quickly corrects herself.) I’m sorry, I don’t know why I said that…
Man – No, you’re right, it’s true… We never think about the worm.
Woman – And you’re not an apple.
Man – I don’t know. I don’t remember anymore.
Woman – Have you taken your medication?
Man – What medication?
Woman – I’ll get you a glass of water.
She exits. He takes another bite of the apple. She returns with something changed, either in her clothing (an accessory) or her hairstyle (a wig). Nothing extravagant, but something very noticeable and slightly unusual. He seems not to notice. She hands him a glass of water as if nothing has changed.
Man – Thanks.
He takes the pills she hands him and swallows them. She stares at him.
Man – What’s wrong? What’s going on?
Woman – I need to tell you something.
Man – Okay.
Woman – It’s not easy.
Man – You’re scaring me…
Woman – It’s not about you. Well, it is, but…
Man – Go on…
Woman – Well, here it is. I’m not exactly who you think I am.
Man – What do you mean? I don’t think anything.
Woman – Still, I’m your wife.
Man – Are you saying that… you’re cheating on me?
Woman – No, it’s not that at all. Well…
Man – Well, what?
Woman – I didn’t cheat on you in the sense of… But I deceived you.
Man – When? With whom?
Woman – Not with another man, at least, so don’t worry.
Man – I wasn’t worried.
Woman – No, I mean… I deceived you, I mean I didn’t tell you the truth. I lied to you.
Man – About what?
Woman – About everything. Since forever. In fact, I’m not quite a woman…
Man – So, I’m married to a man, and I never realized it?
Woman – I’m not a man either.
Man – Alright… Somewhere in between, then.
Woman – I’d say more like neither.
Man – Well… is that why we’ve never had children, I assume?
Woman – Yes… among other things…
Man – Is there something else?
Woman – I’m not from here.
Man – Here? Where are we exactly?
Woman – I come from a different world than yours.
Man – You’re a witch… Your name is Samantha, and I’m Darrin.
Woman – Witches don’t exist. Everyone knows that.
Man – So, you’re not a witch either.
Woman – Do you remember my mother?
Man – No.
Woman – She gave birth to me after an encounter with an extraterrestrial.
Silence. He gazes at her, seemingly searching for a response.
Man – It feels like I’ve heard a similar story before.
Woman – Perhaps in a church, like the one about the Virgin Mary’s pregnancy?
Man – Yes… Or perhaps it’s just the medication…
Blackout.
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A sketch from the collection Not even dead
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