A sketch by Jean-Pierre Martinez
A prison cell. The first one is already there, idle. The second, younger, arrives.
Young – Hi.
Old – Hi.
The young man takes a few steps to familiarise himself with the place.
Old – I’m not giving you the grand tour…
Young – Have you been here for a long time?
Old – I don’t know… I’m losing my memory. In a way, it’s not so bad here, you’ll see… I know I still have a bit of time left, but since I always feel like I arrived yesterday… How many?
Young – 10 years… And you?
Old – 107 years.
Young (impressed) – 107 years? For what?
Old – Fraud.
Young – That’s expensive for fraud…
Old – And you?
Young – I killed a policeman…
Old – Not very expensive for killing a policeman…
Young – A big fraud…?
Old – 115 million.
Young – Who can you defraud 115 million from? Besides another fraudster… A bank? An insurance company?
Old – National Lottery.
Young – Ah, yeah…
Old – The numbers I played were never the right ones. I managed to make the winning numbers the ones I had played…
Young – And how do you do that?
Old – A magician never reveals his tricks. Otherwise, there’s no more magic…
The old man performs a small magic trick, whether successful or failed.
Young – 107 years…
Old – Oh, I won’t make them.
Young – Do you have a trick to escape from here?
Old – A foolproof trick. How much time are you really going to do?
Young – With parole, I might hope to get out in 5 years.
Old – I’ll be out before you. Wanna bet?
Young – You defrauded National Lottery…
Old – At my age… I’ll even leave through the front door. Feet first…
Young – Excuse me, but… Why steal 115 million… at your age, precisely?
Old – It’s true… At my age, there’s nothing more to gain… On the other hand, there’s nothing more to lose either. At worst, it was prison instead of a nursing home. At least here, I’m with young people… Why did you off that cop?
Young – He was my wife’s lover…
Old – Oh, yeah, that’s tough… If he had been a butcher, you would have gotten three years. And you, what do you do in life? Well, what did you do…
Young – I was a watchmaker.
Old – Ah… Here, it’s better not to look at your watch too much… I have a Rolex. Swiss precision… It’s all they left me, I don’t know why. Well, I have a bit of an idea… (He looks at his watch.) By the way, I’ll ask you to excuse me for a moment, it’s time for the draw…
He takes a small radio and puts it to his ear.
Young (surprised) – You still play the lottery?
Old – Old habits die hard… Unfortunately, I can’t go to the tobacconist to validate my tickets anymore.
Young – What’s the point of playing? If you can’t place a bet anymore…
Old – To pass the time! I have nothing more to win, as you said… But they can’t stop me from playing… Last week, I got four correct numbers…
Young – How much?
Old – 19 euros… Want to play a grid with me? And we’ll split the prize… (The young man looks skeptical) You’ll see, you’ll virtually become a billionaire…
Black.
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A sketch from the collection Lost Times Chronicles
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