A Sketch by Jean-Pierre Martinez
A character enters. They hesitate for a moment before addressing the audience.
One – I’m not too late, am I? (Pauses) No, otherwise I imagine you’d have already left… (He looks around the stage, a bit worried) Or maybe I’m a bit early… (Pauses) No, otherwise you wouldn’t already be here… (Pauses) Have you been here long?
Another character enters, also a bit anxious.
Two – I’m not late, am I?
One – Pardon?
Two – No, since you’re already here…
One – Ah, yes… No, no… You’re just on time. At least, I think so…
Two – Have you been waiting for me long?
One – No… (Pauses) In fact, to be honest… I wasn’t waiting for you.
Two – Oh, weren’t you?
One – At least, not so soon… And you?
Two – Me?
One – Were you expecting to find me here?
Two – Well… I thought you wouldn’t be here anymore.
One – I was just about to leave, actually.
Two – For a moment… We might have missed each other…
One – Well, here we are, both of us, that’s the main thing…
Two – Yes, it’s starting to feel like an appointment, isn’t it?
One – An appointment?
Two – Being in the same place at the same time. That’s what you call an appointment, isn’t it?
One – Yes.
Two – If it’s planned in advance, anyway.
One – And if everyone is consenting…
Two – I don’t know why, but an appointment… It makes me think of a space rendezvous.
One – Oh, really…?
Two – Meeting at exactly the same time, in the same place, in the infinite space-time of the universe.
One – A rendezvous… between two spacecraft, you mean?
Two – Two craft that will gently dock with each other. At phenomenal speed, even though it looks like they’re stationary because they’re moving at exactly the same pace. A manoeuvre of extreme delicacy, where the slightest error could be fatal…
One – Two craft that will dock with each other…?
Two – It’s a metaphor…
One – As I said earlier… If everyone is consenting…
Two – Of course…
One – But it could also just be a simple meeting.
Two – A meeting? You mean…
One – A chance encounter.
Two – Chance?
One – A coincidence.
Two – Yes… Well… You know what they say…
One – No.
Two – There’s no such thing as chance, only appointments.
One – There are also missed appointments.
Two – In that case, this one is quite successful. Since we’re both here.
One – And the audience too.
Two – That’s true.
One – It’s the magic of theatre.
Two – So, since everyone is here.
One – At the same time.
Two – Just at the right moment.
One – Neither too early nor too late.
Two – And we’ve nothing better to do.
Together – Let the show begin…
Blackout.
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A sketch from the collection Enough is enough!
Link to the collection for free download (PDF)
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https://jeanpierremartinez.net